Monday, August 31, 2009

Annoying Even At Night

Yesterday I got my first blog request. I called up Gurney to tell her that she had a cameo in a dream of mine the night before, and she said I had to blog about it. Keep in mind that this post would otherwise have not been written. First, as I've said in the past, no one cares about other people's dreams unless they're in them. Which is why I called up in Gurney in the first place. Second, I didn't feel the dream touched upon a subject worth talking about. However, Gurney, who has not yet to come to fully grasp my brilliancefeels that I was (as always in her opinion) wrong in my dream and everyone needs to know about it.

Like pretty much all of my dreams it involved a trip. Essentially my dreams are me going somewhere and visiting briefly rather than staying somewhere. Almost all my dreams take place in temporary locations, I'm never in the same spot for long although I tend to visit the same spots over and over throughout the nights. So this time I was traveling with a fairly decent sized group of people on a trip that was going to take more than one day to complete. I was traveling in a large van that had a 3x2 matrix of captain chairs that were quite separated from each other which created a large middle area (bear with me I need to set some things up). I had a few travel companions, the two most important being Gurney and another stranger who I made up in the dream but we shall call Jerry just cause I need to call the stranger something (you may be thinking that I may be referring to someone in particular, the answer is sort of but not really).

We had plans to stay in my old elementary school for the night (it's a dream I don't have a reason why we were there but it comes up frequently, especially the basement before the renovations). As a result of this we all had the foresight to bring sleeping bags, pillows and sheets. All of us excepting Jerry who only brought a sheet. Additionally, Jerry was wearing blue-jean shorts while I was wearing proper blue-jeans.

Now here is where the dream really got started. Gurney noticed Jerry's lack of bedding and asked me to share mine with him. I happened to have extra everything, including an extra pair of jeans he could wear so that he wouldn't get cold in the night wearing shorts. I did not like this idea at all. Not because I had a problem sharing my extra bedding and jeans, but it was the consequences of doing so. Jerry knew good and well we were going to be staying that night in the school, and like everybody else he should have made preparations to ensure a proper night's sleep. To his credit he wasn't complaining about his situation in the dream, only Gurney seemed to have a problem with it.

So Gurney wanted me to share my bedding and jeans to help him out. My problem with that is that in doing so Jerry would essentially be spoiled. He didn't prepare but was still going to get the benefit of my foresight. If Jerry had special needs that would be one thing, or if he simply forgot to grab his bag on the rush out the door that would be another, but no, instead he just didn't think to bring anything proper. He brought something, in this case a sheet, which indicates he at least had the capability of thinking ahead, but it was clearly not going to offer much help against the hard stone floor. So I said, let him sleep with that sheet. It's only for a night and it will teach him to think ahead next time. It's not like one rough night is going to kill him. Giving him my extra supplies in my opinion was an injustice to him. He wasn't going to learn anything if I gave him that stuff, and in the long run I would be doing him a disservice. By not sharing my stuff I would actually be facilitating his growth. I see no reason why I should enable idiots.

But Gurney wouldn't let the issue drop. She insisted that I give him my extra bedding and jeans. At this point I started getting annoyed. Gurney has that affect on me. And I said I'd give him the stuff. That wasn't good enough. Not only did she want me to give it to him, but she also wanted me to see it from her point of view that I was doing a nicety. I had to do with a smile and charitable heart. I told her she was wrong, but that I didn't care enough to get into another one of our fights about it. I'd give him the clothes off my back and sleep on the floor in the middle of the van (told you it was important) if it would get her off my case. No still not good enough for her. She just kept going on and on about it. Then that broke the straw and I gave her the riot act. It was quite impressive. I remember even in the dream being proud at how it all came out, because normally I don't think of the good things to say until after the fact. This time it all came out exactly how I wanted it to, and after it I stormed off, quite pleased, to the next bit of the dream, thinking that this is what happens when I bottle things up for years on end. Give me a reason and it's all coming out.

The reason I was asked to post this is because Gurney somehow thinks she was right in the dream to tell me to give Jerry my extra stuff. And I still think, just like in my dream, that she's completely wrong here.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I am perfectly proud to be annoying when that means I'm charitable and acting with generosity. Granted I would not ask someone to do something I wouldn't be willing to do. If I packed extra anything and someone was without, then I would gladly share. I would also take the time to help discover why the person had not properly packed. Sometimes we are not careful with one another, sometimes we need to look beyond what we can see and consider that someone might be in a delicate situation or injured in a way that isn't visible. Be gentle with people you encounter, you never know what could be worrying them or could distract them from being as prepared as they should be. I heard this at church during our witness of the spirit. In this case the point was to love your neighbor and provide christian charity.

- gurney


Witness of the Spirit "Love Does That" Meister Eckhart

All day long a little burro labors, sometimes
with heavy loads on her back and sometimes just with worries
about things that bother only
burros.
And worries, as we know, can be more exhausting
than physical labor.
Once in a while a kind monk comes
to her stable and brings
a pear, but more than that,
he looks into the burro's eyes and touches her ears
and for a few seconds the burro is free
and even seems to laugh,
because love does
that.
Love frees.

Spike said...

No. You might as well of said 2 + 2 = 4. A true statement but irrevelent, because as I already mentioned, had there been a special circumstance involved that would have been completely different. In this case, as I have defined in the setting of my dream, the person was an idiot of his own fault. I don't promote dumb. One night's discomfort isn't going to hurt anything.

But to address your comment, I will grant what you say is true, but at the same time being in a delicate situation doesn't mean you get a free pass to do wrong. Had this been the case, obviously I would have given the extra bedding.

But this is a slippery slope. I'm not going to condone a person's wrong behavior just because a person is sad or going through a difficult time. Saying, "well they're going through a rough time" is crap. Jesus went through a rough time. It's not like He asked to be tortured to death. In fact, He made it quite clear He would rather have not. But you don't see Him going off and doing as He pleases, or expecting people to make special exceptions through His difficult time. No, when times got tough He continued to do what was right.

You condone these people when they make poor decisions, and say we can't possibly know. I say, we don't condone those poor decisions because they are poor decisions, it doesn't matter what we do or don't know. Wrong is wrong all the time, not just some of the time. Do we love everyone? Yes. Offer them our support? Yes. Do we condone their behavior we find wrong because of their situation? No. Do we say, well maybe we just don't understand so maybe this wrong is really right? No.

Anonymous said...

It seems like you have all the answers. Maybe you're right but you're going to be lonely if you have such insane expectations of people. People try to do their best nearly all the time and they often fall short, this doesn't mean they aren't loved or aren't worth loving or shouldn't be forgiven. I think if you take a step back you will find that most of life is grey and right and wrong are hard to define and seeing this so black and white will take so much energy and joy out of you that you'll be an empty pit. I think that Jesus would empathize with everyone he encountered and try and see what good things they have to offer and help them realize themselves where to correct their own behavior. I'm not condoning dumbness either, there are enough igmos (ignorant morons) in the world that get in my way each day. I'm just trying to point out that if you took the time to put yourself in someone else's shoes an think of how they might be feeling you could gain a lot.

- gurney

Spike said...

Let us focus on our agreements since I think there is some confusion here. Again, of course I agree that people need to be loved and forgiven if they mess up. I'm struggling to imagine anyone who would disagree with that position.

As for your other point:
I'm not condoning dumbness either, there are enough igmos (ignorant morons) in the world that get in my way each day.
Good, I'm glad you agree with me in real life and are only a pain in my dreams.